Episode 161: Detective Herzog And The $10M Kitty Cartel

Image courtesy of Alison/Winnie.

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I was alone in the office. Jesse was out at the FIRE Gala, but I was just happy to get away from my racist neighbor. It was barely half past two when Trace stepped into my office, casefiles in hand. The first one gave me a good chuckle. Apparently Elon had removed “legacy verification” from Twitter — meaning the only way to get a blue check now was to give him eight smackeroos a month. Everyone from Jason Alexander to SCOTUSblog was threatening to bounce, someone had impersonated the Big Apple itself, and Elon had footed the bill for LeBron James, Stephen King, and — her?! No way.

I gazed at the smoke detector above me, two rectangular holes where its batteries should be, and flipped to File #2. A writer for The Atlantic named Ed Yong had crossed the line from “journalist” to “activist” in his coverage of “long COVID.” Something about the evidence he used smelled fishy as hell. I put it to the side — this was one for Jesse to handle.

The last file was something else entirely. I took a drag of my cigarette, watching the smoke curl lazily towards the ceiling as I kept reading. An old grandma gets raided by the DEA for traffickin’ human growth hormone. No charges. Turns out what she was pushin’…wasn’t exactly intended for human consumption. Then the FDA busts a lady importing “beauty products” from Hong Kong. Confiscate her cars, her mansions. A spreadsheet she kept shows she moved a whopping $10 million worth of product.

“You think they’re connected?”

“A listener tipped us off. Said her cat needed meds, but they’re illegal. The dame says her vet pointed her towards a Facebook group that could hook her up under the table. I think they’re the missing link. Real secretive, though. Won’t talk to anyone who’s not a buyer, so I sent them an invite, pretending to be —"

Suddenly, the phone rang. A booming voice on the other end spoke. “Your invitation to join FIP Warriors® 5.0 has been accepted.”

I stood up and brushed the flakes of weed off my trenchcoat as Trace unholstered his trusty snubnose revolver and adjusted his fedora.

“Start the car, Trace. Looks like we’re going undercover.”

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Blue Checks

The backstory on King’s Hand

https://twitter.com/thatfrood/status/1335689951640494080

The results of the legacy checkmark removal

https://twitter.com/goldengateblond/status/1649162600826167296

https://twitter.com/thatfrood/status/1649179696226000897?s=20

https://twitter.com/realrickpaulas/status/1649136628915380226?s=20

Musk buys Twitter Blue for Stephen King

https://twitter.com/StephenKing/status/1649147510525423626

Long COVID

Ed Yong’s article on Long COVID

https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2023/04/long-covid-symptoms-invisible-disability-chronic-illness/673773/

The CDC on Long COVID

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/long-term-effects/index.html

Evidence is mixed as to whether vaccines reduce the chances or severity of long COVID

https://www.kff.org/policy-watch/long-covid-what-do-latest-data-show/

Household Pulse survey on Long COVID

https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/covid19/pulse/long-covid.htm

Federal Reserve report on Long COVID

https://www.federalreserve.gov/econres/notes/feds-notes/long-covid-cognitive-impairment-and-the-stalled-decline-in-disability-rates-20220805.html

Survey about discrimination against those with Long COVID

https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0277317

Jesse’s response to the article

Shoddy Research Won’t Help People Who Actually Have Long Covid

The New Republic: We Might Have Long Covid All Wrong

https://newrepublic.com/article/168965/might-long-covid-wrong

Stuart Ritchie: Does Long Covid really exist?

https://unherd.com/2021/06/does-long-covid-really-exist/

Ed Yong’s first article on Long COVID

https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2020/06/covid-19-coronavirus-longterm-symptoms-months/612679/

Jesse responds to an unrelated article by Yong

Another Gripe With How Journalists Write About Survey Research

The Kitty Cartel

The Atlantic’s 2020 piece on black-market cat remdesivir

https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2020/05/remdesivir-cats/611341/

Business Insider’s article

https://www.businessinsider.com/coronavirus-treatment-cats-fip-sold-10k-black-market-2020-6?r=US&IR=T

Robin says she doesn’t get kickbacks

https://www.reddit.com/r/cureFIP/comments/11qv50c/proof_that_robin_has_previously_claimed_they_dont/

OneZero: Inside a Facebook ‘Dallas Buyers Club’ for Cat Drugs

https://onezero.medium.com/desperate-cat-owners-are-buying-illegal-cat-drugs-on-facebooks-black-market-cd40bfe90997

Cure FIP exposes FIP Warriors

https://www.curefip.com/post/drama-fip-telenovelas

FIP Warriors

https://www.facebook.com/groups/804374446995270

FIP Global Cats

https://www.facebook.com/groups/595916822107282

Zen By Cat

https://www.zenbycat.org/